[By Crabby and Merry]
Cranky Fitness wishes it had Big answers to Big questions. Questions like: "Is There an Afterlife?" Or "What Are We Put On this Earth to Do?" Or even, "Why Are There Never Any Goddamn Ballpoint Pens in the House No Matter How Many Times We Buy Big-Ass Boxes of Them at Costco?"
As soon as we discover any of the Big Answers, we promise we'll let you know. In the meantime, here are the answers to Friday's Quiz. Go there first if you haven't taken it yet--or do it backwards and feel extra smart when you take the quiz and get all the answers right.
Note: Many of you did very well! And Crabby now knows she should either start watching "House" or avoid trying to fool people with obscure medical facts.
So here are the real studies, not the fake ones, as well as the answers to who wrote which question:
1. (b) Country music fans (at least white ones) are more likely than most to be suicidal. This was true even taking into account Southerness, poverty, divorce rates, and gun availability.
4. (c) One antidote to antifreeze poisoning is the ingestion of alcohol, apparently in large quantities. A vodka IV infusion (three drinks an hour for three days) was used to save at least one patient's life.
5. (c) In studying the "Impact of wet underwear on thermoregulatory responses and thermal comfort in the cold," scientists discovered that there is "a significant cooling effect of wet underwear on thermoregulatory responses." And guess what? The lucky research subjects not only got to freeze their asses off for science, but their temperature was NOT taken orally.
2. (a) I bet you'd give your eye tooth to know that someone really did transplant a tooth to restore a patient's eyesight.
3. (d) Runners who increased their stamina on a treadmill found their sexual stamina had increased as well. How long they could make love correlated with how long they could run on a treadmill. For each additional minute on the treadmill, the person could make love for an additional 2.3 minutes.
6. (b) People who have macular degeneration, and thus trouble with their eyesight, are more likely to suffer a stroke or heart attack.
More from Merry-- I threw in a trick answer: problems with eyesight won't lead to a greater likelihood of diabetes; it's the other way around. Diabetes can lead to an increased likelihood of diabetic retinopathy, among other things.
Another trick answer: Nicotine intake in any form can impair sperm. (Moral: a rookie who likes nookie should not get wacky with tabaccy.)
So, is anyone still around from Friday? How did you do? How's your weekend going? Heard any good jokes lately or have any opinions about the world in general? (It occurs to the management of Cranky Fitness that these quiz posts aren't exactly easy to comment on, so y'all are encouraged to blurt out anything on your minds, or shut down the computer entirely and go outside and have a great weekend).