April 29, 2013

Losing Weight Without Losing Your Mind

 Recycling Blog Photos--Good for the Earth,
 and Cheaper than Getting Sued for Copyright Infringement!

There is a lot of advice out there about how to lose weight, some of which is helpful and some of which is just plain creepy. Anyone else catch that recent tip about infesting yourself with roundworms?

So this isn't a post about how to lose weight. Instead, this is just a few of the 9,700 thoughts I have about the psychological aspects of weight loss.  It's my impression that a determined, focused, lifelong quest to shed excess pounds and keep them off can make most normal people at least slightly bonkers.

Including me! I have certainly not figured out the perfect formula for craving only healthy food in reasonable portions and enjoying complete happiness and joy with every aspect of my physical form. Yet, as usual, not being a perfect role model won't stop me from offering up a few words of advice, 'cause I'm hypocritical like that.

April 27, 2013

Diving In

Sorry folks, for all of you now spoiled by outstanding guest posts: the Crab is back from vacation.

And yes, this means yet another self-indulgent photo-packed ramble!  Expect the usual miscellaneous musings, tiresome tips, blog-related blather, annoying alliteration and ridiculous rationalizations, all dressed up and masquerading as post about health and fitness. Complete with a Theme That Doesn't Always Fit the Contents!

D'ja miss me?

Oh.  Okay. Well, anyway, let's Dive In!

April 22, 2013

The Long Slow Climb

As Crabby continues lolling on the beach in Maui, we have another great guest post from Shadowduck! Not only may you recognize Shadowduck as a valued blog commenter and contributor, but he is the English translator of the popular Chilean webcomic "The Juanelo Show."

On August 16th 2009, at the final of the World Athletics Championships in Berlin, Usain Bolt broke his own 100 metre world record by eleven hundredths of a second, crossing the line in just 9.58 seconds. Four days later he repeated the feat, this time slashing eleven hundredths off his own 200 metre world record. In those few summer days he established himself categorically as the fastest human being of the modern age, and one of the greatest athletes the world has ever seen.

So what has he been doing since 2009? Well, he's been doing fine. A few olympic medals here, a 4x100 relay world record there.

But what he hasn't done in the last three and a half years is run faster than he did in 2009.

April 17, 2013

The Little Mermaid And Breast Implants

While Crabby is taking a week off on vacation, Cranky Fitness is honored to present...

A guest post by Gaye of Confetti Drop!

Once upon a time, in my early 30's, I was in slamming shape. 5'2", 110 pounds, 16% body fat.

This came after having topped the scales at over 200 pounds, so I was pretty much living the dream! It was the very first time in my life that I didn't have “thigh balls,” or what others refer to as saddle bags. Thing 1 and Thing 2 were gone! It was a miracle!!! But sadly, gone too were my breasts.

April 15, 2013

Healthy Pursuits: Wandering Off and Coming Back

So yeah, in this week's shameless attempt to take a bunch of random stuff and force it into a theme...

Have you ever noticed that life is sometimes a lot more like a circle than a straight line?

We don't so much take off in a straight path with the "old" behind us and the "new" in front of us.  Instead, we circle around, visiting new things and returning to old things, and we just hope like hell that there's some interior growth along the way so that each cycle adds more awesomeness and less screwing up.

Or hell, lets call it a Spiral rather than a circle.  Because not only can you add another dimension and make it pretty, it comes with the whole fancy transtheoretical theory of change attached to it and makes a blog post sound more sciencey!

Anyway, all this leads to four thoughts I wanted to share:

April 11, 2013

Nectresse Monk Fruit Sweetener Giveaway Winners

And the winners of the monk fruit sweetener are....


Congrats all!

Please email me (at address on schmooze page) with your mailing info by end of day Monday April 15th.  Not that there's anything else you may want to take care of by that deadline that could be slightly more important...

Note: if you missed the giveaway post, here it is in case you are still curious about alternatives to stevia. (And, for those of you with blogs striving to be sneakier, did you catch the shameless example of using "artificial sweeteners" to help innocent strangers find your posts? Though I know most of you probably prefer to go the pure and natural route.)

April 10, 2013

Bored on the Elliptical?

Note: this photo is courtesy of HerCampus, which has even more tips for avoiding elliptical boredom.

(And how come I just realized after writing the word boredom that I think I pronounce it as though it were spelled "boredRum" when it seems there is only one R in the word?  Crap. I've been doing that for about 50 years now, wonder if anyone noticed?) 


Does Anyone Else "Play" on the Elliptical Machine?

If you are a person who uses an elliptical machine, you may have discovered that you need to experiment to keep it from getting excruciatingly tedious.  The HerCampus article above has more of a "distraction" approach, whereas immature Crabby prefers a more ridiculous approach...

April 08, 2013

Monk Fruit: A Stevia/Splenda Alternative Sweetener That Doesn't Suck? (Review & Giveaway)

So how did I not hear about monk fruit until now? Duh. I somehow missed the whole thing.

Well, actually, I did recognize "luo han guo," a name that monk fruit also goes by, as one of the ingredients in the sinisterly addictive protein bars I've been scarfing down ever since the Quest Bar Review.  But I hadn't really noticed the squat orange jar or packets on the grocercy store shelf until I got a PR email on behalf of the folks at Nectresse. I just thought of it as some obscure ingredient only food manufacturers had access to.

In brief, monk fruit is a natural sweetener with almost no calories or glycemic impact. And you can now get it in most grocery stores as an alternative to splenda, stevia, sugar, agave syrup, or whatever the heck else you use to sweeten things up.

But is it safe? And how does it taste? And what was that bit about a giveaway?

April 02, 2013

Do You Bother With Baselines? April Goals & Giveaway

So for those who are new here, this is a monthly Cranky Fitness feature in which Cranketeers check in about goals, or maintenance, or life in general, and offer each other support and encouragement by replying to each other's comments.

We've got a couple of nifty MOVband activity monitors as a giveaway at the end of the month, for those who like to measure stuff to see how they’re improving. (Though sadly, this is one of those "U.S." only giveaways, sorry).

And, in my usual awkward attempt to link the giveaway items with some sort of theme, I thought I’d offer a couple quick thoughts on whether or not to bother establishing "baselines."

No, not the kind you have to hit a baseball on the correct side of or it’s foul.

Or, if you prefer, “fowl”.

No, I mean the sort of baseline that establishes exactly how pathetic or awesome you are currently, before you start messing around with some new sort of plan or scheme to get better results.

Oh, and, we'll also find out who the winner of last month’s Polar HRM Monitor is!

April 01, 2013

Pranks A Lot

Our "goals" post for April will be up tomorrow, and that's when the Polar HRM winner from last months post will be announced. We're in the car today, traveling back from a fun and busy visit with friends and relatives in the SF bay area--too short, as we didn't get to visit many folks we'd have liked to!  On the other hand, even unplugging for a few days has gotten me hideously behind on all things internet.  (I may be a slacker, but at least I like to keep it fresh with new excuses every week for not getting sh-t done).

But anyway, even though I'm not really blogging today, I do feel it my duty to warn those like me, who are often cheerfully oblivious as to what day of any given month it might be... to perhaps take a look at a calendar or other time-measuring device of some sort.