November 26, 2015


Guest Post by Jan Bono

Crabby and the Lobster are off in Playa del Carmen feeling very thankful for just about everything, as you can imagine. On Crabby's return she will no doubt torture you with photos. But meantime, here is an excerpt from Jan Bono's, “Back from Obesity, My 252-pound Weight-loss Journey,” in which she faces her very first Thanksgiving determined to eat only “healthy” foods.  Happy Thanksgiving! --Crabby

Giving thanks for broccoli and other green things

Six weeks into my commitment I butted up against the holiday specifically dedicated to stuffing oneself with stuffing. Not even in my wildest imagination could I fathom living through the fourth Thursday in November without eating to excess.

Understandably terrified, I knew I couldn’t trust myself to go anywhere near my family of origin; there were way too many land mines to navigate. Dealing with all those life-long familial issues while precariously clinging to my fledgling food plan was too much to ask of myself. I didn’t have enough time invested in this new lifestyle to feel comfortable not using food to medicate around my relatives.

It may sound simplistic, but all my life I had “coped” with the family drama by overeating. Not wanting to get sucked back into my old, ineffective coping skills when I was just getting my life back on track, I talked it over with friends in my support group. Putting me first, and practicing good self-care, I politely declined the invitations to “go north” for the holidays.

November 24, 2015

Coming Soon: Cranky Fitness Heads to Austin!

photo upload via philip kromer

By Crabby McSlacker

As regular readers may recall, Cranky Fitness is a migratory beast, roaming back and forth each year from Provincetown Massachusetts to San Diego California. This is because Crabby McSlacker and her partner-in-crime "The Lobster," are free spirits who love an adventure! Or else it's because the crustacean couple are really just a pair of spoiled brats too wimpy to survive winter in an isolated New England coastal town.  Either works.

But this year, instead of San Diego, we decided to mix it up and go elsewhere during the colder months. And that elsewhere is ... Austin Texas!

The reason I'm talking about Austin now, when we don't leave 'til early January, is that I just got alerted to the fact that Prevention's R3 Summit on women's health is happening in Austin January 15 and 16.

A women's health conference taking place in a cool city the weekend after I arrive there? What excellent timing! So I felt compelled to do some wheedling and pleading and try to beg my way in for free to cover it for the blog. Because I am totally shameless resourceful like that.

But as it happens we've got a promo code for a discount for Cranky Fitness readers if you're in the vicinity and want to attend!

So why Austin? And what's the deal with the conference?

November 16, 2015

Whazzup? Crabby Checks In

By Crabby McSlacker

Hey there!  So here is yet another post packed with slow-to-load photos that has nothing to do with health and fitness. Even though this is theoretically a health blog.

I mean, sure, I could try to turn this post into some sort of preachy "how to stay fit when life gets distracting" thing, but my advice would suck.

Because here's the secret to how I manage to keep up my exercise routine in the midst of many adventures and distractions and upheavals: By stubbornly prioritizing exercise, slacking horribly on other self-care and creative endeavors I should be pursuing, barely earning any income at all, and relying on the pragmatic, emotional, and financial support of my super-achiever, long-suffering wife.

Unless you've won the lotto or managed to procure a spouse like mine, I suspect my advice wouldn't be too helpful.  If I lived a normal life and wasn't so ridiculously blessed with undeserved good fortune, I'd probably have gotten about 3 minutes of exercise this year, and coped with stress and/or excitement by repeatedly sticking my head in a pail of Toll House cookie dough and washing it down with a vat of Two Buck Chuck. Instead, I've been hiking, ellipticalling, biking, swimming, doing HIIT, weight training, and even my own invented frighteningly weirdo exercises. I've been pretty much keeping on track fitness-wise, even if I do tend to undo most of it by eating like a pig.

So yeah, this isn't going to be advicey, just chatty. And as usual, it's just to put something out here to say hi, and try to entice some of you into letting me know down in the comment section what you've been up to and what you might be planning and what's on your minds these days. I miss you guys!

Anyway, what's been so distracting that I've barely made an appearance on my own damn blog in months?

November 09, 2015

How to Break Free of Nasty Food Additives in 3 Simple Steps

Guest Post by Dawn Riccardi Morris

Where is Crabby McSlacker? She's in Las Vegas of all places, celebrating her mother-in-law's 90th birthday.  And how cool is it to have a mother-in-law who wants to party in Vegas for her 90th? But anyway (in one of the lamest segues ever), let's remember that gambling is something best done in a casino for fun, and not in your local supermarket with your family's health at stake! This next guest post tackles the dilemma of food additives in processed products, even the supposed "natural" ones. Please welcome Dawn with her thoughts on how to make snacking less of a crapshoot.--Crabby

Why does it have to be so hard?

Every time you think you’ve got this healthy eating thing down pat, another article pops up about how toxic the food supply is.

Who has time to keep track of it all?

You thought you were ahead of the game because you can’t remember the last time you ate junk food. Geez, you even gave up your favorite chips, and your usual candy at the movie theater.
And you can’t remember the last time you drank a diet soda.

But even more frustrating is that you’ve been buying products that are labeled “all-natural” and “organic” for a while now. How can harmful food additives still make their way into your home?

November 02, 2015

The Great Columbia Crossing: A Bridge Too Far?

Guest Post by Jan Bono

Yes, the Great Columbia Crossing came and went again a couple of weeks ago. Wouldn't it be nice if Crabby McSlacker weren't so behind in putting up guest posts? The timing would have worked out way better, so sorry.

Anyway, while the host of this blog may be slothful, many of you readers are not.  So if you're contemplating a race or other athletic endeavor that seems daunting, here is some inspiration! You can find Jan's book Back from Obesity: My 252-pound Weight-Loss Journey” either in print or as an ebook on Jan's smashwords page. --Crabby McSlacker

A long and arduous journey

On Sunday, October 10, 1999, one year after I committed to weight loss, for real, my friend New York David had challenged me to define my long-term goals. “Dare to dream big,” he told me. “In your wildest imagination, what would you like to see?”

I had thought for a long moment before replying. “I want to be healthy. I want to lose a significant amount of weight. I want to be active and fit. I want to go dancing with you in a red sequined dress.”

“Is that it?”

“And,” back then I had taken a deep breath, “today’s the Great Columbia Crossing, otherwise known as The Bridge Walk. It’s 10 kilometers, which is 6.2 miles. In my wildest imagination, I want to do The Bridge Walk.”