November 05, 2007

A Cry For Help

photo credit: phaln

Brand New URL!

(A Poem by Crabby McSlacker)

Crabby had a little blog
With "blogspot" in its name;
Not sleek at all;
Who could recall
An URL so long and lame?

It followed her around the web,
From when she was quite small,
But change the name? Or just complain?
'Cause page rank; it might fall!

But one day "blogspot" she threw out,
And now she needs your help.
Please change your links
(She knows; it stinks)
And help her keep her clout!

(The End).

Sorry, Crabby couldn't help herself.

But check it out! If you look above the blog at your browser window, you might notice there's a new address up there. You've been redirected from icky old to the simpler, more elegant "". You can also find Crabby by typing in: "" (but it takes longer). So tell all your friends! (Yeah, right).

The upside: now, when people who are trying to be nice to Crabby in social settings ask her, "So where is your blog thing on the web?" Crabby will no longer have to screw up her face into an unflattering quizzical expression and report: "Um, you know? I don't actually remember. Just google Crabby McSlacker, you'll probably find it." (Crabby hopes this is the reason virtually none of her friends except the Super Super Nice ones tend to visit; however, she suspects it might be because she writes a bizarre health blog, in the third person, as a crab).

Anyway, back to the URL thing: Crabby never got around to memorizing the address of her own blog. She'd just type "cr" in her browser window and the rest would fill right in. Then she'd copy it from there if she needed to. After six months, this was getting stupid.

Now, even the tiny-brained Crab can remember

The downside to the name change? Well, from what she understands, by deciding to change her URL she could basically end up starting over as a new blog. Technorati and Google and all the other imperial Rulers of the Internet will think: What's this tiny thing? No one's ever heard of it! No one has ever linked to it before! Nothin' to see here; move along, move along.

So here are some things you all can do to help the Crab feel less insignificant, if you care to.

Crabby hopes that those of you who have the Crab on your blogroll, or who are ever thinking of linking to Cranky Fitness for any reason, might start migrating to the address. And readers, while you can still arrive here the old way, could you maybe start switching your bookmarks to the new address? Coolio!

Also, could you please let Crabby know if the change has messed with your feeds or made the site hard to get to or whatever? She's still trying to figure out the technical stuff and suspects she still has Things To Do to make everything work correctly.

And to top it off, there is one final request, but only for the Truly Brave:

Crabby had a blast writing her stupid poem, and it reminds her that she likes reading silly poems even more than writing them.

Anyone got one, or want to write one? Crabby would love to put a few silly poems or haikus or limericks together for a future post, perhaps even next week. It doesn't have to be about anything in particular, but extra points if it's about health (in the broadest sense), or blogging, or if it rhymes, or if it's funny. There is nothing to "win" but gratitude and publicity for yourself or your blog or your favorite charity.

If everyone says "no way in hell," no worries. Crabby will just inflict another one of hers on you someday and you'll be saying to yourself, damnit, why didn't I send something in, she's really terrible at this!

You can leave them in the comments to this post, or, if you don't want to spoil the surprise, email them to Crabby. If none arrive, Crabby will just pretend she never asked and you all have to play along with her.

Oh, health news?

Right. This is a health blog. Here we go, comin' right up:

If you'd like
A bigger brood,
Stay off the couch,
And skip junk food.

(The study actually says: Diet And Lifestyle Changes May Help Prevent Infertility).

(See? You all can do WAY better than that!)


  1. Hi, Crabby at your new address. The Bag Lady got here the same way as ever, and has now bookmarked your new address, over-writing the old one (so hopefully, she can still get here the same old way!) Loved your little poem, and will work on one later (maybe while she's having her Procedure - the drugs might help!!)

  2. Echo Bag Lady re: getting here and loving the poem.
    You're a Very Brave Crab for making this change.

  3. I tried to add your new url to my bloglines and it said I was already subscribed. You may interpret that how you will.

    Congrats on the new name!

  4. I use Yahoo to read my blogs and it had already changed your information.

    Congrats on your new url! (That sounds SO weird!!)

  5. Bag Lady, drugs would definitely help with the kind of poetry I'm hoping to get--the loopier the better! (Good luck & hope it's over quick).

    leah, not brave, just getting too old to remember my own URL!

    bunnygirl--hmm. I think that's good, right? And thanks!

    holly, yeah, maybe Hallmark needs to come out with a new 'I've changed my URL greeting card'--for life in the new millenium!

  6. Ooooh. Spammers stink.

    Good for you for making the switch. And that poem?You are way too creative.

    I do have the url minus the blogspot and I still do that thing where I type in "si."

    It's SO much easier for word to spread when you simplify like that. Way to go!

  7. Ha Ha!! You are too much! I finally memorized the 'old' URL, though half the time I would make a typo and have to re-do it. I used to look for your comments on Diet-Blog to just click on them to help me get here. So much smoother now :-)
    Dr. J

  8. Hi Crabby, I changed my bookmark with your new fabulous non-blogger name! Keep up the crabbiness please!

  9. Ok, my dear crabby
    I'm in for a rhyme
    I'll write you a poem
    but it make take me some time.

    I've noted your address
    and changes I'll make
    it's not all that hard
    a click of a button is what it takes.

    I must do some work now
    to help pay some bills
    but a poem I will write you
    about health stuff and ills.


  10. Limerick for you:

    There once was a Crabby McSlack
    Wasn't sure the readers'd come back
    So with aplomb and with grace
    Just switched up the place
    They flocked to like hookers to crack!

  11. someone stole on me a few months ago.

    one would think i'd be hip to all of these things as i register domains on a daily basis.

    alas, I am a dumbarse.

  12. Yay! Congrats on the new domain name! Now you look all professional and official-like. :)

  13. Good poem Crabby. I am changing my link right now. I'll see if I can come up with some poetry but don't hold your breath!

  14. A little haiku:

    Smudge, black and white cat,
    Your gifts of slimy hairballs
    Are not loved by me.


  15. Okay, here's a lame one:

    I know an old chick in Manhattan
    Who said one day while we were chattin':
    "It would be really nifty
    If once over fifty
    Your tushie did not tend to fatten."

  16. Thanks Katieo--I always tend to copy everything you do at your site, and you were way ahead of me on this one!

    Dr. J, glad you found your way here--we certainly can't have you go missing on us!

    Jennredd, thanks so much for reading, for changing bookmarks, and for dropping by to comment!

    Way to go--one great poem already and more to come? Can't wait!

    Kristen--Awesome! I think there is some sort of requirement that limericks be at least a little bit 'politically incorrect' and you've written a great one! Crabby only wishes she were that addictive.

    Marie, that's criminal! How can anyone else be allowed to have Mousearoo? May the internet server gods render their pages unreachable until they give up the name to the one and only Mousearoo.

    Chickengirl--thanks! And I'm jealous of your hyperlink--for some reason I can't get a hyperlink directly to my site when I comment on other blogger blogs now that I've changed my URL. (It worked last week when I was experimenting with the old CF address). If you're still around: how'd you manage it?

    Thanks, and I'd love to see any poetry you'd care to put forth!

    Missicat: I love it! I once saw a book of cat haiku and yours is every bit as good. There is something about 'catness' that seems well suited to haiku.

    Melissa, hooray! Funny and even fitness related, that's fantastic!

  17. Crabby -- I don't have a Blogger account, so when I comment I use the "other" identity and fill in the name and URL manually. That's why it goes directly to my site.

  18. Thanks ChickenGirl! That's what I was doing last week, but it stopped working today after I changed my URL. (I hate sending people to an intermediate profile page when they click on a comment). So I thought maybe there was something fancy you were doing to link to a non-blogspot account. Hmm, maybe I'll have to experiment some more.

  19. hehehe, cute poem! It made me giggle. And I'll get you changed on my blogroll to your new address! And an excellent and elegant new address it is. :)

  20. Thomma Lyn, thank you! (And I'm still smiling from that nice walk in the woods you took me on this morning).

    Oh and ChickenGirl--problem solved. I'd typed in the address wrong with the slashes going the wrong way, that's why it didn't work! Der.

  21. Big Fan of Little Poems! Keep 'em Coming.

    I wrote a poem to my muffin top.

    Thinking of writing one to my ass next.

  22. Poetry.

    Oft-cursed, oft-praised,
    Its virtue far too oft-essayed,
    How I despise its rhyming lies
    And wish it would go away.

    But Crabby requests it!
    And though I am scared,
    I try my best
    to fulfill her request
    And maybe get a laugh here and there.

    Fitness, then, is the topic at hand
    Attaining it? Like climbing a rope of sand.

    I can scarcely count calories day after day
    Any more than I can rhyme in damnable A-B-B-A.

    But a worthy goal it is, is it not?
    And hardly just 'cause we all want to look hot.

    A healthy body leads to a healthy mind
    (Which in a writer you so rarely find).

    So hit the gym and do some running;
    Trust us, the extended lifespan will be stunning;

    Your endurance? That'll raise as well,
    Though you may feel like you're braising in hell;

    But It's worth it, so worth it, so don't be so witless--
    Once every day, go read Cranky Fitness!

    ...with this I have fulfilled my Poetry Quota for the next five million years.

  23. silly health news? I love it and I'm linking!

  24. P.O.M.--Love the muffintop poem! And next, an ode to your ass? I can't wait!

    Jim, Oh my Goodness! Not only is it about fitness, and is all elegant and everything, but you managed to work ABBA in there! (And did not have to resort to abracadabra, which I might have sunk to). I'm eager for the next 5 million years to pass so I can read your next one.

    Plaid Earthworm--thanks for stopping by and linking--and btw, you have a couple great blogs there, which I plan to be stealing from... er, referring to as soon as I get organized enough!

  25. There once was a blogger named Crabby
    Whose new blog was looking quite shabby*
    So she said "A great poem!
    Send one, that'll show 'em!"
    And voila! Mary took a stabby.**

    *poetic license, i.e. not remotely connected to the truth except insofar as beauty is truth and truth, beauty -- in other words, if it even remotely rhymes, I'm going with it
    ** What, you were expecting Keats? Or Yeats? Or even William McGonagall?

    pwwsha - the sound made through pursed lips when being inflicted with an especially feeble poem.

  26. Fun idea, Crabs. Here's mine:

    I'm getting the new feed from Google reader just fine, too. Looks like you done good.

  27. There once was a blogger, McSlacker
    She really was quite a good Yakker
    She lived with a lobster
    who wasn't a mobster
    and the Moo, who was not a RatPacker
    What do you expect, I've been stoned half the day...

  28. Okay, how about:
    There once was a blogger named Crabby
    Who tended to be a bit gabby
    she blogged about fitness
    she blogged about health
    in an effort to save us from flabby

    Okay, I'll stop now...

  29. Congrats on the new name Crabby, first comment as a actually person today all others have been as Anonymous.
    But anyway will do on the new address!
    p.s. looking forward to some healthy peoms

  30. I use Google reader and have had no problems with the feed. I also e-mailed you a link to a poem that I posted on my blog a while ago. Let me know if you don't get the e-mail and I'll re-send.

  31. i still got the feed fine. it works like a charm. you need to really move to wordpress platform. lol.

  32. Mary, not only was that poem quite witty, but I loved the "world's' worst poet' link--I may have to use him for inspiration.

    Susan-for some reason the link didn't work in my browser, so I'm not sure which specific one, but you've got lots of great poetry sprinkled throughout your site!

    Bag Lady, most excellent! Thank you so much for two great poems, and hope you are recovering and back to chasing cows and such very soon.

    Thanks so much Tyler, Israel, and Vanilla, glad you all found your way over!

  33. Ok.. late to the party. I'll email one to you. :)

  34. You're right about accountability being very important. I use my blog to hold me accountable -- which right now means a monthly update for my 101 Things list.

    But I do want to start using my blog to hold me accountable for fitness-related things, too, especially since I've gotten more serious about working out in the past 4 months or so. I think readers are able to get inspiration when they see bloggers holding themselves accountable for accomplishing a certain goal, too.


Thanks for commenting, Cranky Fitness readers are the BEST!

Subscribe to comments via RSS

(Note: Older Comment Threads Are Moderated)