March 27, 2015

Broasted Chicken and the Banishing Bra


ByJan Bono

Yep, it's time for another amusing and inspiring post by blog contributor Jan Bono! See more about her on our "info"page and don't forget to check out her “Back from Obesity: My 252-pound Weight-Loss Journey” either in print or on Jan's smashwords page. --Crabby


Saying “no” to food not allowed on my healthy food plan is often a challenge. Sometimes I manage to say “maybe,” or “later,” but occasionally I throw sanity to the wind and scream “Hell, yes!”

It takes discipline to maintain a 252-pound weight loss—something I’ve managed to do for over a year—yet there are days when that discipline is in short supply. So naturally, I need solid strategies in place to keep me from caving in on a regular basis.

One sunny Saturday afternoon I stood before the open refrigerator, pondering my food choices for the rest of the day. I’d already had my usual yogurt breakfast, my mid-morning low-sodium V-8 juice break, and it was time for a satisfying low-calorie lunch.

But today there was nothing in the fridge that appealed to me. I closed the door and peered into the cupboard. Nothing too exciting there, either.

What I really wanted, I realized, was that amazing broasted chicken they served in the local bar.


Nowhere on earth could you find broasted chicken that tasted any better, and the more I thought about it, the more my salivary glands kicked into high gear. Before long, I realized I had to have that chicken.





I added up my calories for the day: just 170 measly energy units. Since my ideal daily goal is “less than 1500,” that gave me a whopping 1330 to mess with, but it had to include both lunch and dinner. Never mind that by eating the chicken I’d be through eating for the day by 2 p.m. and that I’d most likely be ravenous again by 6 or 7 o’clock. I knew what I wanted, and I wanted it NOW.

An order of half a broasted chicken was one humongous breast, thigh, wing and drumstick. And of course, jo-jos came with it. Jo-jos and ranch dressing.
By carefully manipulating the numbers, I could estimate, with a straight face, the calorie count of that meal coming in at right around 1800 calories.

Eighteen hundred and 170 was 1970. Well, gee! Nineteen-seventy was still within my food plan’s rather loose “upper limit” of 2000 per day! Accounting for “special occasions,” I had promised to cut myself some slack as long as I stayed below 2000 calories in any one day.

Deciding it was a “special occasion” for the sun to be shining so brightly on a weekend on the southwest Washington coast, I rushed to pull on my tennis shoes. I could already taste the first bite of that scrumptious chicken!

I debated whether or not to call ahead so they could have my coveted chicken, which I knew took 20 minutes to prepare even if there weren’t any orders ahead of mine, ready to pick up and take out the moment I arrived. No way was I going to eat it there, where others could watch me wolf it down. I planned on going to the nearby ocean beach approach to eat in peaceful solitude.

“Solitude?” I heard a little voice ask. “Isn’t that the same as eating in secret? Just what kind of healthy food plan justifies sneak eating?”

That little voice, my fledgling food conscience, was becoming a tad bit annoying. More often than not, that little voice was messing up some previously very enjoyable eating experiences.

It’s not sneak eating, I thought to myself. It’s legal food on my legal food plan.

“Yeah, right,” said the little voice in a tone I previously thought was reserved solely for snotty seventh graders.

I stopped grappling with my shoelaces, and sat totally still for a moment on the living room steps. What are you really up to? I asked myself.

“You’re not going to like the answer,” said my little voice.

So what shall I do about it?

“Put all your bras into the washing machine.”

I beg your pardon?

“You know you won’t leave the house without a bra on,” said my little voice. “Do what you need to do to keep from going out and beginning what could turn out to be the ominous start of a multi-day binge. You have no idea where this one indulgent meal could lead you. Do the right thing here, girlfriend.”

I cringed. No! I want my broasted chicken! If I’d been standing, I’m sure I would have stomped my foot. I’ll only eat the chicken! I’ll skip the jo-jos and the ranch dressing! Pull-ease!

The little voice was silent.

It’s difficult to argue with silence.

Still sitting on the carpeted living room steps, I sighed in defeat. I kicked off my shoes, stood up and pulled my shirt over my head. I unhooked my bra right there, took it off, and walked into the utility room. “This is crazy,” I said aloud.

But crazy or not, when I threw my bra into the washer, turned the water on and went into the bedroom to retrieve my other two industrial-strength undergarments, I knew in my heart it was the right thing to do. Throwing my bras into the washer banished any thought of leaving the house, just as my little voice said it would.

And when I stop long enough to listen to my little voices, I become more willing to go to any lengths to stick with my food plan. I’m halfway home. So I dropped the rest of my laundry in with my bras, added detergent, and made myself a fabulous bowl of soup.

The next Saturday evening, I took a friend to the bar with me. We split an order of broasted chicken and opted to replace the jo-jos with coleslaw. Both of us were well-satisfied with the meal we ate.

Better yet, we stayed well within the parameters of our individual food plans, and both of us were wearing bras.

21 comments:

  1. What a great story!! And a great strategy for dealing with temptation - force yourself to take a timeout and then plan it in when appropriate. Thanks for the laugh, Jan - and a new tool to put in my impulse-control first aid kit!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks for reading my post, Emmaclaire! As you know, you gotta be willing to do what it takes, no matter how strange or silly... Like me!

      Delete
  2. Gosh did I ever need to read that right now! Thank you! I have lots of tricks, but they are tired and I need some new ones. All bras to the washing machine is one I certainly will use.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Happy to add to your healthy strategies, Anonymous! You can do it!

      Delete
  3. Ha! I have worn a jogbra to bed to try and ensure I got up and worked out, so this is like the inverse. :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ooooo, Outsmart, I could never wear anything to bed (but a smile!)... But we each do what it takes! Bless us every one!

      Delete
    2. wearing a bra while you sleep does not allow your lymph to drain properly which is essential for breast health

      Delete
  4. What a great idea - I've never thought about it, but no way in hell would I leave my house without wearing a bra, either. Excellent way to save you from yourself!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Exactly my sentiments! No bra, no public appearances... Of course, I normally don't go out without earrings, either, but there were calories at stake, so I might have made an exception!

      Delete
  5. Love this story…nice job on getting those bras in the wash and passing on the start of a possible binge!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh, Kimberley, it was touch and go... Glad I "just did it" and rushed through the house before I could change my mind!

      Delete
  6. I had to laugh--I haven't worn a bra in more than thirty years. (Any exercise that would make my breasts complain would make my knees and ankles complain much sooner.) But I congratulate your little voice!

    Mary Anne in Kentucky

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Wow! Braless in Kentucky, I'd sooner go naked than braless, so you know THATS not going to happen any time soon!

      Delete
  7. Whatever stops you is a good thing! Sometimes i sit my inner child down for a good talk, and if she's asking because what she really wants is attention, i give her some, but not with food.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. What KIND of attention, Messy? Share your ideas! We can always use some new insights!

      Delete
  8. Fantastic!! I would no more leave the house without a bra than I would kick a kitten (and, in my book, kitten kickers have a special place reserved in a really hot place!). I love this story and the reminder to do what it takes to stay the course. Those moments are rough and I find it increasingly easy to justify "special occasions" the longer I do this.
    Thank you for this and for the laugh. I think I have to go put all my bras in the sink now. . .

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Genie! If you've been reading my posts here, you know I even carry a cat or two in my arms while I ride my recumbent bike, so I certainly agree with you on kitten kickers! And also, my longtime mantra is STAY THE COURSE! Best wishes!

      Delete
  9. LOVE it! I have always preached a time out when we might do something we can't own. All is god if we can own it & move on but otherwise, stop, think about it for 10-15 minutes OR do what you did!!! :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Jody--- Please further explain the concept of "stop and think about it for 10-15 mintues" !!! LOL Never, ever, have I been able to do such a thing! Good for you!

      Delete
  10. HaHa - sneaky way to trick yourself into staying in!!! I like your compromise of splitting a meal with your friend.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You know, Kim, sometimes just a good "taste"... like the wing and drumstick... satisfy that immediate craving. It has always helped me to surround myself with good conversation and friends who are willing to split a meal.... Just choose friends who won't take all the dark meat!

      Delete

Thanks for commenting, Cranky Fitness readers are the BEST!

Subscribe to comments via RSS

(Note: Older Comment Threads Are Moderated)