February 14, 2014

Lovely Links: Screw Valentine's Day Edition

By Crabby McSlacker

So yeah, it's Valentine's Day, but let's say the hell with it here at Cranky Fitness, shall we?

It's not like there aren't a million card-and-flower-and-jewelry pimping commercial enterprises out there, urging guys to fork over big time, or making gals feel crappy that they are single and haven't rounded up a husband yet which is of course supposed to be their primary mission in life. Or worse, that they've picked some unromantic loser who forgot the occasion entirely or grudgingly offered up a mylar balloon and an insulting card and a Snickers bar and called it a day.

Plus, I didn't want to round up a Valentine's Day image...because yay, I finally found the perfect (and appropriately CC licensed) photo for these links posts! (Not that rusty chains resembling giant pretzels aren't fine and all). But I wanted something fun enough to be permanent so I didn't have to think about it and could plop the same thing in here every time.

And am I the only one immature enough to think it's awesome that the woman pictured appears to be an actual Official Wiener Inspector? Though I have to say she doesn't look impressed.

Anyway, so here are a few fun blogs and other links I've bumped into recently while wandering the Wondrous Worldwide Web.

Humorous Fitness Blogs!

So I've been on the lookout for blogs that combine health and fitness themes with humor. Finding perky earnest wholesome fitness advice is not hard--but I prefer my tales from the trenches to contain at least a few swear words.

(In fact, at some point before too long, I'm going to be asking for your favorites so we can compile a list of the the Best Funny Fitness or Weight Loss blogs and have them all in one place. Jot down a few ideas and stay tuned!) But in the meantime, here are a few I've run across recently.

First up is iFuckingLoveFitness. Katy is a snowboarder who likes monkeys, progressive house, and 18th Century France, plus she is a poutine-eatin' Canadian!  Cranky Fitness loves all things Canadian and would relocate there in a second except for the whole weather thing.

And another fun one is Does This Blog Make Us Look Fat?

Blogger Rebecca is also the inventor of The Twitter Diet, which, fear not, does not require that you subsist entirely on dishes made from small chirpy blue birds. I think.

So I couldn't find much on the "about" page for Running Is Funny, so I don't know what we might be in for if some of us go over and insist that Mike make good on his promise to model this pair of B-Skinz:  ya think we should we give it a shot though?

Next up:  Some of you may have wondered what was up when Cranky Fitness actually used an animated gif in a recent post on music and exercise.  (And I am still unclear if this will get me sued by elderly disco dancers bearing high-priced copyright lawyers.) So why this sudden crazy move into the 21st Century?

Clearly I was under the influence of Vodka and Soda! Kat, yet another Canadian, is a foul-mouthed IT geek and fitness freak and she totally cracks me up. She will also whore out your blog for cheap if you want to sponsor her ass, now why didn't I think of that?

Did you know Cranky Fitness has a Facebook Page? Should it?

I'm trying to post and share a few things on the Cranky Fitness Facebook Page other than belated blog posts, but it's sort of a Catch-22: hardly anyone ever sees, likes, comments on, or shares the posts, so it's hard for me to motivate to update, so there's not much over there, so nobody goes there to see or like the posts... blah blah blah, you get the idea.

Also, because it is a blog facebook page and not a personal one, Facebook won't even show the postings to 95% of those who have actually bothered to like the page... unless I hand over $$ to the Facebook overlords.  Which ain't gonna happen.

I think you have to add Cranky Fitness as an interest, interact with it a bit, or go directly to the page itself to really have much chance of seeing anything.  So the next few months are kind of an experiment to see if it's worth any of us hanging out over there.

Note: but thanks to a helpful Facebook commenter, I have now discovered one of the wonders of art history: the Japanese Fart Scroll!

See what you've been missing?

Seek and Ye Shall Find:

And finally, a few more random queries that led readers to Cranky Fitness recently:

"Kelp noodles anxiety"

"Crabby cat singing happy birthday"


"Going to the gym after age 35 useless?"

So, what's on your minds this Fine Friday? 


  1. I love the wiener inspector. What's on my mind? I had bacon and chocolate for breakfast. I'm happy. I occasionally stop and marvel that I lived long enough that bacon is embraced by certain diets, and wine and chocolate are health foods. Life is oh so very good.

    1. Life is indeed good Leah and I love your choice of breakfast items!

    2. I had peanut butter oreos...somehow I doubt they will be embraced by any diet but my own. :)

    3. OMG QD, I did not know such a thing existed but now I cannot stop thinking about how much I would LOVE a peanut butter oreo!

  2. Love love love the new link pic. It is hilarious, and her expression pretty much mirrors how I feel after the week this has been. Super hectic work requirements + not being able to go to the gym = megasuck. I will happily check out those links, though. I just realized that yours is the only fitness blog I read. Quality over quantity, yeah! \o/

    I do tend to like the Facebook posts, but you're right that getting them to appear in my feed has been hit or miss. I'll try sharing more (keep forgetting I can do that) and see if it helps.

    1. Healther, YOU are almost single-handedly providing motivation for me to visit facebook, thank you so much for all your help over there.

      But so sorry for the mega-suck week and hope next week is much better!

  3. Perfect weiner picture for you. That is all.

  4. It would be tough for me to choose between jungle print tights and short racing shorts for the quintessential "dorky old man runner look." http://www.runningisfunny.com/2009/06/12/dorky-and-old-is-ok-if-youre-a-runner/

  5. I'm so horrible about keeping up with FaceBook these days!
    I love Vodka and Soda (the blog!!! and maybe the drink...)!! She makes me laugh every day!

  6. A wiener inspector, a desperate housewife, a pair of B-Skinz and artwork that renders one quite speechless... and this is why you're one of my favorite blogs!!

    1. Thank you so much Anne Marie--and you have a cool blog too!

  7. On my mind? Almost anything but Valentine's Day. I do like watching my 5-year-old granddaughter work very hard to write her classmates' names on their cards, but after about 2nd grade, it turns into a sort of icky holiday. So - yoga, zumba, abs, run, oh, and work, and a nice peaceful (ordinary) dinner at home with my husband. That works for me.

    Your links are bonus points. I can't wait to find time to go over and see Does This Blog Make Us Look Fat! Hilarious!

  8. Enjoying a bottle of Two Buck Chuck's ex's wine called Crane Lake and some candy that my neighbor lady gave us. I read your FB stuff but rarely comment. Thinking I should make my blog more humorous. That's all. Happy Valentine's Day Crabster! :D

  9. Flower delivery has been on my mind. Running up and down flights of stairs with heavy flower arrangements has been on my mind. Facebook -- not on my mind. So far, i've been able to avoid it, and i hope to continue to do so. As for the Japanese art, not much surprises me there.

  10. It's that she is inspecting skinned wieners that has me perplexed..haha great post! As usual you crack me up!!! Have you seen Bad Grandpa yet? I have a feeling you will or do like that movie. I was falling out of my chair.

  11. I am happy to help!

    And OMG, my name is now Healther. Was that on purpose? Because if not, it's an epic typo. Either way, I love it. :-D

  12. Thanks for sharing the links...wiener inspector...what a job! I love funny blogs and have come across one that I really enjoy. http://stuffdutchpeoplelike.com

    I think you have to be Dutch (I am) to appreciate the humour.

    It was fun heading over to Mike's blog as he linked to his favourite post of yours and I was happy to see I too was loving you back when you turned 50!

    I am not sure any of the above came out properly...too much studying is erasing brain cells.

  13. I think I just got it. Inspecting wieners on Valentine's Day. :)

  14. Great post! I love the weiner inspector photo! Hahaha! :))


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