By Crabby McSlacker
So as you may recall from the first Dead-Blog of Natural Products Expo West 2014, we've established that I'm too lazy and greedy to "live blog" a trade show like most sensible bloggers. The whole "reporting" thing tends to get too much in the way of Eating Free Samples As Fast as You Can Snarf Them Up.
And it's the same deal today! I'm in and out with clients to talk to and shelter cats to visit and Other Shit to do, and can't get it together to post all the pictures and impressions at once. Plus there are lots of "healthy" snacks left to sample and I can't do it all in one sitting or I'll explode into a huge four-alarm gluten free organic non-gmo stevia-sweetened conflagration. Not pretty.
Also, sorry, I know I've been spotty about comment reply, which is especially lame as the comments to recent posts were so great, but will try to pop in better later this afternoon. But I ABSOLUTELY LOVE when you guys reply to each other and talk amongst yourselves! Do you have any idea how freakin' rare that it is in the blogosphere?
OK, a brief Part One and I'm off to the gym...
(All times West Coast even though Blogger still thinks I'm in Provincetown).
2:20 PM:
Crabby notices that she's still got a lot of non-blog things left to do today, and yet there are even more photos and opinions to share! She has got to be the slowest photo-blogger on the planet.
So, sorry, Cranketeers, there is at least one more dang post about the expo, and the products featured therein, comin' down the pike. Thanks for your patience!
12:50 AM:
More pictures in random order, with no effort to make them flow logically because my brain officially shuts down by mid-day. (Note to self: remember this the next time the notion of "blogging throughout the day instead of finishing up in the morning" comes up.)
At the beginning of Day 2, with as yet mostly empty bag:
The irony of the giant tote bag emblazoned with the words "Think Thin," soon to be stuffed completely full with treats and snacks, was not lost on me. But it didn't keep me from dutifully filling it up with junky natural snacks either.
Can you guess what "arty" water contains?
Yep, artichokes!
Not as disgusting as it sounds, kinda refreshing, though it's not gonna make it onto my grocery list I don't think.
Just sayin', I'm not the only one who was scooping up treats, but the Lobstah was far more restrained on the consumption end than I was.
One of the 9 bazillion gluten free offerings. Nothing all that healthy about them, but YUM, they were really, really good.
As hard as it was to stop scarfing up food momentarily, occasional breaks were required for rest...
..and caffeination.
(Not pictured: the 467 dixie cup sized coffee samples Crabby consumed throughout the day. And sorry, she didn't notice what kind and whether they were good or not.)
The Lobster doesn't like coffee and was caught sneaking an unnamed and entirely unnatural carbonated beverage noted for its high caffeine content. She downed it as quickly and unobtrusively as possible as she feared she might be escorted off the premises.
(Not pictured: the 467 dixie cup sized coffee samples Crabby consumed throughout the day. And sorry, she didn't notice what kind and whether they were good or not.)
The Lobster doesn't like coffee and was caught sneaking an unnamed and entirely unnatural carbonated beverage noted for its high caffeine content. She downed it as quickly and unobtrusively as possible as she feared she might be escorted off the premises.
And Crabby continued to find new ways to work on "personal growth" issues! In, um, many dimensions.
8:11 AM:
I'm recalling one of the BEST things about the Expo Adventure, and it happened before we even got in the car to head up to Anaheim. Knowing I was gonna eat like a starving water buffalo for two days straight, I went to the park to get in a quick Playground Workout ahead of the impending gluttony, and guess what happened?
A dream come true! A Cranketeer spotted in the Wild!
The Hungry Hydrologist was kind enough to approach and utter the words I've always wanted to hear in a public venue:
"Are you Crabby?"
YES!!!
It was a great start to the Expo adventure. BTW, the Hungry Hydrologist is totally adorable and charming. I maintain Cranky Fitness readers are the most awesome in the world.
And speaking of Rare Sightings:
I made the Lobster take the picture above because it was one of the few times we saw actual fruits and vegetables at the expo that did not come straight out of a package.
Would have probably been smart to notice what the heck was being advertised though, huh?
What was Unsurprising and Predictable was that there was generally an inverse relationship between "healthy" and "tasty."
Aside from being made from natural ingredients, there was nothing particularly healthy about these Hannahmax Baking Cookie Chips made from sugar, white flour, butter and eggs.
But OMFG, these are insanely delicious! They taste homemade and are totally crunchy and addictive. In the "natural but non-healthy ingredients division" I'd call these BEST IN SHOW.
Are you guys tired of Dead-blogging yet? Please break it to me gently 'cause there's more to come throughout the day!
A Crabby-spotting in the wild! Marvelous! (Should we all have t-shirts?)
ReplyDeleteOnce again the word "natural" does its thing.
Mary Anne in Kentucky
If we all walked around with shirts that said CRABBY we would soon create a fashion trend and be invaded by the fashion police crowd. Besides that we would have to put up with family walking around with that secret grin that is so annoying!
DeleteFirst of many Crabby-spottings?
DeleteThe virtual community is going live - fantastic!
Sadly I feel it's unlikely I'll spot unless there is travel planned for a special blog on fitness while visiting the south of England.
Love the UK, Fliss, so it's always possible. And Cindy, I kinda like the idea of "Crabby" t-shirts, as our families and friends are already onto us, but we might as well warn strangers!
DeleteI vote that all samples that Crabby picked up have to be taste tested by her eventually!! Don't try to tell us you don't look at a quarter of that stuff and decide nope I'm full like forever!
ReplyDeleteHow cool to be spotted in the wild!
ReplyDeleteI won those cookie chips on another blog a couple months back and you're right - they're AMAZING!!
ReplyDeleteGlad I'm not the only one who couldn't resist temptation. I think they slip crack in there or something. 100% organic natural GMO-free crack of course.
DeleteCookie chips. Best of both worlds. How wonderful to be spotted in the wild and identified.
ReplyDeleteOH - so awesome to have a "Crabby" spotting - soon you won't be able to go in public without being recognized and stopped!!!
ReplyDeleteIt was so fun to run into you too! (And I'm so relieved it was you, so that my question Are you Crabby? didn't come off as totally rude) :)
ReplyDeleteHA HA!! If it had not been her you really could not have put your foot in your own mouth any further. Maybe that has been the problem. We need a secret hand signal or code language so we don't get in trouble harassing unwitting Crabby impersonators.
DeleteGood point! And "Cranky" or "Ms. McSlacker" don't work too well either! :)
DeleteHoly cow...cookie chips? I have sooo got to try those! I thought I was in heaven when I had cookie butter (think peanut butter without the peanuts...COOKIES!)
ReplyDeleteCookie butter? Oh my goodness, I'm kinda glad I didn't see any because I'd probably never stop once I started inhaling!
DeleteI so miss all the fun stuff that happened out in CA. Being in NH, we don't get a lot of "fun expos" that often, but if you want to go to the Maple Syrup festival it's coming up.
ReplyDeleteSince i couldn't be there myself, i'm enjoying hearing the reviews of products from you.
ReplyDeleteLooks like you and the Lobstah are having great fun!
ReplyDeleteHee, I should always keep my eyes peeled when I'm out and about in San Diego just in case there's a CRABBY sighting!
ReplyDeleteAre those Dr. Scholls shoes? I have a pair in blue that look pretty similar, and they are so freaking comfortable.
Will keep my eyes peeled for ya OTF!
DeleteAnd yep, they are Dr. Scholls... though I had to buy them myself after several fake giveaway/review promises, so I shouldn't even show 'em off just to spite them. I will say my Skecher go run rides are even more comfy for a long day on my feet, but these are pretty good and a little more fun looking.
Crabby, you are so funny. LOL thanks for that.
ReplyDeleteThere are coffee samples? Many many coffee samples? Suddenly this expo is in my target area.
ReplyDeleteMary Anne in Kentucky
Sorry Mary Anne, I was useless on the coffee coverage--was using it more as fuel! I have my own favorites at home, one cheap (one of Costco's decafs) and one I have sent from the bay area that I love (Cole Coffee Flor de Cana) and I wasn't on the hunt for new varieties.
DeleteLOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE THIS and seeing you so happy and smilely and...snack'y?
ReplyDeleteWhat a hilarious post, Crabby!! I love that the Lobstah is a secret soda drinker :). And - what, Mountain Dew, to boot?!! She seems so perfect (from previous posts, etc) - that this is somehow 'comforting' to me of many vices.
ReplyDeleteOMG, Jan, I went bu the organic chicken place multiple times just to get real protein & I found a couple real veggies too - I sort of stalked the real food booths! ;)
ReplyDeleteIf this has been dead blogging, then I am dead commenting. Oh and in the support group I lead, I brought in a label touting "Gluten Free"! It came off my dog's dog food bag.
ReplyDelete