Meet My New Research Assistant!

 

I'd like to introduce my new BFF, Chatty McClanker. She's been helping me do personal research for many months now, and now I'm inviting her to help me here, too!

Chatty is tireless, resourceful and intelligent. She will scour the far corners of the globe to answer my questions, however inane. She's also encouraging and compassionate. Sometime her brilliance is astonishing. Other times she's a total idiot.

So everyone has an opinion on Artificial Intelligence. And it raises so many questions. Is it a harbinger of End Times? Will it rot our brains if we use it too much? Will it steal our jobs and even our creativity? Can we trust it? Will it tell us to go out and do stupid things? Is it worth paying extra to ask it endless questions? What's it good for, anyway?

Not that I can answer all those. But I can report that some of my experiences with Chatty McClanker have been... interesting! 

Cranky Fitness Tries the Holofit Virtual Reality App and Can't Shut Up About It

So I keep pestering all my friends about my favorite exercise addiction, the Holofit VR App, and they are getting awfully sick of hearing about it. Good thing I have a blog again!

(BTW, this is not a paid post. I got nothing for free. Those glory days of fitness blogging are all over for yours truly. In fact, the poor Holofit people don't even know about this. Imagine how thrilled they'll be to find out they've been endorsed by a geriatric blogger who often writes under  the name Crabby McSlacker!) But to fully disclose: I was so blown away by their exercise app that I purchased a lifetime membership. Which  even makes me a shareholder, yay! But technically: I have a miniscule financial interest here. But it is the least of many many reasons that I want them to be successful.

Here's the short version: Holofit is a virtual reality fitness app that can connect with an exercise bike, rower, or elliptical. It makes you feel like you are zipping through totally immersive three dimensional worlds, whether they be magical, urban, science-fictiony, mythical, or beautiful spots in nature. Sometimes all of those at once. (Note: two dimensional pictures do not do the graphics justice, they are detailed and amazing).

So, wanna know more about this whole Virtual Reality contraption that I'm so obsessed with?

It's Alive! The Return of Cranky Fitness?

Wait... I thought I killed this thing!

It makes no sense at all to bring Cranky Fitness back from the dead. No one reads blogs anymore. And of all the blogs people could be not-reading, this one seems an unlikely candidate for resurrection. 

But on the other hand...

I still have an obsession with health and wellness: I want more! I want to be strong and disease-free and live a good long life full of ridiculous adventures. While at the same time, I remain stubbornly slothful and hedonistic. So I want hacks and shortcuts! But not false promises and hype. How to sort it all out? For me, it's still a work in progress.

I also have thoughts on a whole lot of other subjects too, spinning around in my head relentlessy, like the wheel of the worlds fittest hamster. It seems I may need an outlet.

I know that should I decide to keep posting, I'll probably just be talking to myself. But that's ok! As I totter off into my Golden Years I figure I'll be doing more of that anyway. Better here than in line at Stop and Shop.

So for those brave enough to Read More, let's start with a brief update, and then move to possible plans for the future. Including a Cranky Conspiracy with a secret hidden agenda!

Cheers! The Penultimate Post

So today I turn 60. And even with all the horrors going on right now--a lethal virus allowed to run rampant by a reckless leader, the rise of an authoritarian regime bent on destroying democracy, millions of citizens on the brink of economic ruin, and racism, sexism and xenophobia run amok--I'm still superficial enough to be a little creeped out about having a milestone birthday.

I always imagined 60 as the portal through which middle-aged people traveled to arrived at official old age. Now that I'm stepping through the threshold myself, I find myself shrieking: "Noooo, not me, not yet! I'm not ready to be old!"

And sure, aging is natural and 100% organic, just like dying. I should embrace the whole life-cycle, right? Not just the younger, firmer, prettier parts. Because, um... wisdom? Perspective? Getting to shop at the grocery store at 6 am if you want, before the younger less-vulnerable people buy up all the toilet paper?

Nah, I'm still grumpy about it. On the plus side, it's mainly the number that's bothering me, not any meaningful physical limitations.  They'll be heading my way soon enough. But for now, except for the gray hair, wrinkles, and having to scroll through drop-down menus for twenty minutes to find my birth year when I fill out online forms, this aging thing has been a pretty benign process.

But on approaching the big Six-Oh, it seemed a good deadline for addressing some Unfinished Business.  Like: Cranky Fitness, this blog with the wonderful readers who have meant so much me, has been sitting out here for a couple years all by iteslf, still on-duty, looking all awkward and expectant.

Bring it On

By Crabby McSlacker

photo: U.S. Air Force

So it's Holiday Season!

But wait, where's Santa Claus? No Menorah? No sugar cookies or snowmen or pine trees? And what's with the spunky aviator gals in leather jackets, that's not very Christmassy!

Well, okay, traditionally the holidays are a time for festive celebrations, fun, frivolity, togetherness, and generosity. But also they're a time for year-end reflection. And my goodness, what a year 2017 has been!

What a year indeed.

So, setting aside any bright moments you may have enjoyed in your personal life this year (and I'm hoping there were many, many of them!)... does anyone else think that 2017 may have been the most toxic, noxious, depressing, abysmal, terrifying nightmare of a year we've ever experienced?