Comments on Cranky Fitness: Life-Hack: Ten Even Easier Ways to Get Up Early

My whole life, people have tried to tell me that i...

2008-09-22T04:06:00.000-04:00

My whole life, people have tried to tell me that if I'd just go to bed early, and get eight hours, I too could come to love getting up crazy early (like before noon).

Fuck that noise. :)

Now I'll admit that after two years of having to be at work at 9 most mornings, I was starting to start to get sleepy at around midnight. I was also starting to wake up naturally at eight--although days I didn't have to get up I promptly fell back asleep. And even if I did get out of bed, I was useless until noon.

TWO YEARS of this pattern. Want to guess how long it took to undo? A week. So everyone who thinks it's all a matter of forcing myself to sleep early, blah blah blah, can SO go pound sand. :)

Er, dj,... it's supposed to be HUMOR. If you want...

2008-08-14T06:18:00.000-04:00

Er, dj,... it's supposed to be HUMOR. If you want a "serious" list, there are only about 9,000 other places to find one, including the link in the first paragraph.

huh? bull crap!! i cant believe someone will fall ...

2008-08-14T04:49:00.000-04:00

huh? bull crap!! i cant believe someone will fall for this list...

Hi TK--great comment!I'm with you on the Harleys--...

2007-10-18T09:26:00.000-04:00

Hi TK--great comment!
I'm with you on the Harleys--we used to live in NY a few blocks from the bar "Hogs & Heifers"--quite a racket when it was closing time & they'd all drive down the street. And bikers don't seem to prefer early bedtimes.

Oh, Crabby, Thanks So Much, #5 nailed me and I lau...

2007-10-18T02:39:00.000-04:00

Oh, Crabby, Thanks So Much, #5 nailed me and I laughed so hard it was a good thing I wasn't drinking coffee or I would have needed a new keyboard. You are such a JEWEL! :D

The points made about sunlight and the auto coffee both work and the coffee is great incentive, but I'm such a purist I hate the thought of grinding the beans the night before. Just the smell will wake me though; hubby fresh ground beans at 6am on his day off, to set the brewer up to go at the push of a button for me before he left to do early morning dawn light stuff (he's in bed by 9pm and up at 5, me at 2 am and up at 10) and I smelled them all the way uptairs in another room and sat up looking groggily around for a fresh hot cup, because sometimes he brings me one early if he wants me up. SUCH disappointment when my squinted blurry vision saw no sign of any such thing. Almost got me out of bed to see if there was any fresh hot real brew downstairs. But bed was tooo comfortable and just that exact right temperature that says, nope, not worth it. Had had 3 hours sleep if I was lucky...

I had a puppy alarm but he is a big boy now at 8 1/2 months and is a very well behaved Poodle. I've trained him to keep MY hours.

The skunk thing'll get one up anytime day or night, I had a battling family one summer that lived under a porch next door, and my fan would suck fresh vapor in at 2am, 3am, 5 am (time when the trash truck came twice a week), plus we had a parking lot across the street with a sweeper truck at 1am twice a week that also scraped the gum off asphalt I guess as it was such a horrible sound, and then there was the city tree watering truck with the nasty screechy air brakes once a week. And two different Harleys, one at 12am, one at 1am or 2am, the latter with straight pipes, coming down the street every night. I tell you it was a house from hell and I didn't sleep at night for more than 30 minutes at a time for a year!

Oh, and forget going to bed early if it's a full moon, it tugs at my blood or something, I never even think about it, just find out later that's what kept me wide awake. *sighhhhh*.

Linda,Ewww skunk! That's definitely something fou...

2007-09-20T07:17:00.000-04:00

Linda,
Ewww skunk! That's definitely something foul enough to wake you up out of a dead sleep!

Got a new one at about 1 AM. SKUNK. Now that is a ...

2007-09-19T16:19:00.000-04:00

Got a new one at about 1 AM. SKUNK. Now that is a rude awakening! Some neighborhood cat or other critter woke up the skunk, who was none too pleased, and neither were any of the neighborhood residents. BLEAH.

Thanks for stopping by, JoLynn!

2007-09-11T07:13:00.000-04:00

Thanks for stopping by, JoLynn!

This list was just too funny, thanks for giving me...

2007-09-11T01:11:00.000-04:00

This list was just too funny, thanks for giving me a laugh today (LOL). :)

Sorry Katherine!Actually, if you're only 23, sleep...

2007-09-05T06:03:00.000-04:00

Sorry Katherine!
Actually, if you're only 23, sleeping late and a lot is totally normal! And it's good to get what you need even if it's more than than average.

Plus if your schedule allows it, enjoy it! All the people with alarm clocks are just jealous. (But yikes, cold water! I bet you're glad those days are over.)

All these people referring to 10am as "sleeping in...

2007-09-05T00:38:00.000-04:00

All these people referring to 10am as "sleeping in" are making me feel guilty. I'm 23 and have always been a late sleeper. In college, I would schedule my classes for 8am in attempt to get my ass out of bed, but it never worked. As a child, alarm clocks never worked, and my older brother resorted to pouring cold water over my head to wake me up in time for the bus. Now I'm a freelance writer, and I sleep at least ten hours, usually getting up around noon or even 1pm.

Hi Norabarnacle!"Persistent" sounds like a nice eu...

2007-09-03T07:39:00.000-04:00

Hi Norabarnacle!
"Persistent" sounds like a nice euphemism for "satanic!" Yikes!

When I had a cat, he used to jump on me and bite m...

2007-09-03T04:32:00.000-04:00

When I had a cat, he used to jump on me and bite my face. Then I'd hurl him toward the door. So he'd jump on my desk and start knocking stuff off. He was pretty persistent!

Great solution, Meg!And exercise still "counts" wh...

2007-08-29T07:24:00.000-04:00

Great solution, Meg!
And exercise still "counts" when you're unconscious, at least that's my theory.

my solution is to sign up for an early a.m. pilate...

2007-08-29T00:45:00.000-04:00

my solution is to sign up for an early a.m. pilates class where they take my $ whether i show up or not. however, this is sadly *not* foolproof--i have had many mornings where i wake up late only to discover that i just spent cash while unconscious!

fun post (as always!)

And Jennifer, no wonder you never sleep! That pos...

2007-08-28T19:52:00.000-04:00

And Jennifer, no wonder you never sleep! That post of 50 home decorating thingys was amazing. I can't believe you used up so many incredible finds in one glorious post!

And now thanks to you I feel I must have my own personal robot.

Dr. J.,According to noted sources, Roosters have a...

2007-08-28T19:33:00.000-04:00

Dr. J.,
According to noted sources, Roosters have a lifespan of 55-58 years. (Just kidding. Hope you didn't actually pull the trigger just then).

ChickenGirl,
Bitterness seems entirely appropriate! I'd be pissed if some job made me stay up past midnight. Yawn.

Missicat,
Cat time, yes, is the Official Time that must heeded! (And you're as whipped as I am, apparently).

Goinggone,
You too, huh? I like the way you put that: "It feels like the world is up to something and I need to be in on it." Great sentiment!

Penelope, I'm surprised! Certainly a cat of your Intelligence and Resourcefulness could find a way to awaken a mere human? My cat is, frankly, dumb as a box of paperclips but even she can manage this task. Perhaps you are Kinder and more Sensitive than you let on? Either that or Karen is champion First Class Sleeper of the highest order.

Try coughing up a hairball on her forehead.

I wish I can make Karen wake up in the morning. It...

2007-08-28T19:04:00.000-04:00

I wish I can make Karen wake up in the morning. It doesn't matter what I do, she hits the snooze about twenty times. I really resent it when she's still in bed at six in the morning. She's impeeding on my morning naptime.

-- P

"Because everything is apparently much more intere...

2007-08-28T17:47:00.000-04:00

"Because everything is apparently much more interesting to Web Users if it comes in a list and contains some reference to computers!" Many statistic show this. In fact I'm betting your blog will get more hits today simply based on the title.

You know my secret to early rising -- don't go to bed in the first place. When the sun comes up there you are. Not wide awake mind you; but there.

Most mornings I am up by 5. The older I get the m...

2007-08-28T17:46:00.000-04:00

Most mornings I am up by 5. The older I get the more I can't sleep in. It feels like the world is up to something and I need to be in on it. It also helps knowing if I don't do my cardio EARLY, it ain't going to get done.

Definitely #3 works for me...my little guy makes s...

2007-08-28T15:30:00.000-04:00

Definitely #3 works for me...my little guy makes sure I get up "on time", according to the Cat Clock. Which of course, is THE official clock... grrrr....

Unfortunately, some people get stuck with jobs tha...

2007-08-28T13:32:00.000-04:00

Unfortunately, some people get stuck with jobs that demand attendance at less than optimal hours. So they get to play the hide-the-alarm clock games.

Yeah, I'm one of them. Hence the possible smidge of bitterness about the whole cultural "early to bed, early to rise!" expectation. (Bitter? Moi?)

I have a geeky "alarm clock game", though. I have my computer set to start playing music in the morning, starting out quiet and then gradually fading in to an Uncomfortable Volume, at which point I have to get out of bed and turn it off.

This is enough to get me conscious and make me get started on my morning routine, but that doesn't mean I'm in any condition to Get Things Done, unfortunately. :p

Actually Crabby, I was 'locked and loaded, but I c...

2007-08-28T13:29:00.000-04:00

Actually Crabby, I was 'locked and loaded, but I couldn't bring my self to off another living creature just for some zzzzz's. So we just pretend we are the Beverly Hillbillies and use some soft white noise. How long do they live, anyway?? :-)

Dr.J(ethro)

Pelikan,Twenty Six is Young, trust me! And that's...

2007-08-28T12:13:00.000-04:00

Pelikan,
Twenty Six is Young, trust me! And that's a great tip about timing your waking to your lightest hours of sleep. Sometimes I get up extra early if I've woken up anyway, because if I go back to sleep I'm dead tired when the alarm goes off.

Hi Leth,
You and Sarah definitely need to give me Cat Training tips. And isn't it funny how college seems to be conducive to sleeping in late? And yeah Sunlight--very helpful Waking Mechanism. (But I have NO plans to give up coffee!)

Mary,
I think you should give up your doctor instead! (Though don't recommend the tequila method, having tried that as a younger person with Unsatisfactory Results).

Hi Geosomin--you've got a door-digging feline too, huh? And I do think age alters the sleep schedule I bit. I wake up much earlier than I used to. But I always think that the best is to work with your own body and try to arrange the rest of life around your best sleep schedule--hard to do in practice!

Terrie,
I'm totally with you on the "do what's best for you" thing. Suppose I should have said so somewhere in the post! There's nothing more inherently virtuous about the early morning hours.

Thanks Dr. J!
And I've never had the "pleasure" of living next to a Rooster. But I suspect it could make even a hard core vegetarian have a sudden hankering for an axe and a big stock pot full of water.

Hey Jim--somehow I would have guessed you were a night owl. Hey, aren't you supposed to be at the tables at Vegas raking in the dough? Or sleeping--hell it's not even noon yet!

ChickenGirl,
Good point about the sleep Nazis! I've personally grown fond of the "asscrack of dawn" myself, but often feel jealous and unhip compared to the people who can stay up past nine or ten and actually go out and have Social Lives! To Each Her Own! Unfortunately, some people get stuck with jobs that demand attendance at less than optimal hours. So they get to play the hide-the-alarm clock games.

Lisa,
You need your extra sleep, right? You're sleeping for two! So you're coming up on your due date pretty soon, huh? Please keep us posted with all that 'free time' you're going to have.

Hi Noah,
Sounds like you do an amazing job of being flexible given the nature of your job. So you get to be the 5am cat feeder? Lucky you! And on the rare occasions when I fly, I set at least two alarms which I don't even need because I wake up all anxious hours before the alarm is set to go off anyway.

I used to bid all red-eye flights so I could work ...

2007-08-28T12:04:00.000-04:00

I used to bid all red-eye flights so I could work all night and sleep all day. Now I have some that leave early in the morning and some that leave in the evening. Not my choice, but it gives me more days off.

I also set two alarm clocks, one right next to my bed, and one across the room, and my cell phone just in case. I am really paranoid about oversleeping and not getting up in time, especially if I have to be somewhere in the morning.

My girlfriend is one of those irritating wake up early AND happy people. If I'm not working I sleep until at least 10, if not later. Of course I also stay up until 4 or 5 in the morning without issues, so that may have something to do with it. We also have a cat who has declared me to be the official 5am feeder. I just wake up do it, and go back to sleep.